Pedicure Etiquette

I had my first pedicure yesterday. How I could have made it 40 years without experiencing the beautiful joy of a pedicure is a mystery. Never having had one before, I wasn’t aware that there are rules, procedures and etiquette for having a pedicure. I’ll now share a list of newly learned tips:
-Shave your legs before you get a pedicure—it’s just not polite (and kinda icky) to give someone rug burns off your leg hair stubble
-Don’t wave your foot around in the air to get a better look at the toe nail polish—nobody likes getting kicked in the face
-Don’t get paranoid when the employees are talking to each other in Vietnamese, they probably aren’t talking about you, unless you just kicked one in the face
-Don’t skate around the salon in the paper flip-flops shoes going, “woo woo, chugga chugga coo coo”
-Skinny jeans are a bad choice to wear when you are getting a pedicure—your pants will only roll up so far
-Be prepared to bite your lip when your feet are exfoliated—it will tickle something fierce and giggling, “teehee” will just make you sound like a lunatic
-You seem cheap if you don’t tip the manicurist, and fuzzy candy from the bottom of your purse doesn’t count
-When the manicurist grabs your shoes and purse they are just moving them for you, so yelling, and “Stop thief!” is very bad, don’t ask me how I know
-Yelling “Ouch!” every time the manicurist touches a toe nail is only funny for the first 4 or 5 times
-It’s probably not a good idea to bring a rubber ducky or toy boat for the foot soak tub, toys are frowned on in nail salons
-Don’t wait until your toe nails are 4 inches long, just to give them something to work with
-Don’t ask the manicurist, “So I hear people who work with feet have a thing for feet, you don’t want to suck on my toes or anything do ya?"
Next week I’m going for my first facial, I’ll let you know how it goes.